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Sermon - November 1st, 2009
Keys to Contentment
Rev. Gwen Drake
Scripture: Hebrews 13:5-6; Ecclesiastes 2:10-11 Luke 12:13-15
Prayer of Preparation: We give thanks, O God of sacred stories, for the witness of your word today. Through Scripture you challenge our assumptions, increase our awareness, nurture our imaginations, and touch our feelings. Bless the hearing of the word today. Speak to us and grant that by the power of your Spirit we may be hearers and doers of your word. Amen.
When I was a senior in college at Eastern Oregon in LaGrande, I applied for a teaching job in Australia. I submitted an application, was interviewed, and a few weeks later received a letter in the mail saying I had a job in the state of Victoria. My airfare from San Francisco to Melbourne was paid and I was scheduled to leave in August. I was 22 years old. I was excited and nervous and eager to go. I had no idea what I needed to take with me. I wanted to take my books. Books were my main resource. I didn’t take very many books. I wasn’t all that sentimental about anything. I had a horse and a dog. I couldn’t take them. I gave my dog to my Mom and left my horse on the ranch. My brother wasn’t too happy having a “hay-burner” on the ranch so I gave him permission to sell her.
I had a much more difficult time moving back home from Australia. I had bought a piano, some furniture and a car. All of which I had to part with. Since, I turned 18 the longest I have live in one place was 8 years. Possessions and stuff are not fun to move. So when Jesus said, “Life does not consist in the abundance of possessions.” I believe him because it has been my experience. Every time I move I learn again how hard it is to move my possessions.
So, I am one of those unusual people that has to make myself go shopping and to buy something new, I really have to need it. I do not have the urge to shop. Shopping is one of my least favorite things to do. And when I do it I like to get it over with quickly. Does that mean I have figured out the key to contentment? No, it probably means I have issues.
What is the key to contentment in our economy that thrives on discontentment? Not that discontentment is a bad thing. God created us with both the ability to be discontent and content. Discontentment motivates us to discover, invent, create, seek, grow, learn. We have to have discontentment or we wouldn’t have progress and change. The problem is when we direct our discontentment toward acquiring more stuff, something new, something we don’t need. James Mackintosh was a Scottish philosopher and politician in the late 18th and early 19th century. He said, “It is right to be contented with what we have, but never with what we are.” Adam Hamilton says, “In other words, it is a positive motivator to be discontent with our moral character, our spiritual life, our pursuit of holiness, our desire for justice, and our ability to love. These are areas in which we should continue to grow and improve, for we are meant to become more than we are today.”
Some people are motivated to come to church because of discontentment. This is a good thing. However, it also can turn into a huge disappointed if they come to church expecting things to be perfect in church. People in church have “warts” too. Someone might say something wrong, an usher might not be friendly enough, we might not have the right kind of music, we might not have enough youth and young people, or the pastor may say something that hurt our feelings. And before long they can’t see anything that is good and off they go, church shopping. Some people have the belief that the grass is always greener on the other side. They seem to cultivate discontent in their lives.
I was that way when I was a teenager. I was a miserable teenager at home. After my father was killed, I was discontented with my Mom. I missed my Dad desperately. I resented my Mom. It’s terrible thing to say, but if I had had a choice about which one of my parents was going to die, I wouldn’t have chosen my Dad. I was a miserable teenager for my Mom to live with. Nothing she did made me happy. The best decision she made was the decision to go to seminary to become an ordained United Methodist pastor. She let me figure it out for myself while she did what she needed to do to find contentment in her life.
We struggle with discontentment in our lives. The Apostle Paul wrote: “Actually, I don’t have a sense of needing anything personally. I’ve learned by now to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I’m just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little, I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty.” The entire Phillipians letter is full of joy, infectious happiness, which we might think is crazy because Paul is in prison. Paul had found joy and freedom and enthusiasm for life. It’s a good letter to read when you are down.
Adam Hamilton has four keys for cultivating contentment in his book titled Enough. The first key: Remember, it could always be worse. We know this. We know it well. I don’t recommend practicing it on each other, though, only on yourself. When someone is telling you their problems, disappointments and difficulties, just listen, refrain from saying “it could always be worse.” That is not helpful or sensitive. Let them figure it out because they will… eventually. The best gift we can give one another is to listen and honor them with our trust to figure it out on their own. That’s the gift my mother gave me…over and over again…is her trust.
The second key to contentment is to ask a simple question: How long will this make me happy? One way to learn this is to watch our children. It is a difficult lesson that we learn over and over again. One thing we can do before we buy something is to try it out if possible. Rent the car of your dreams for a weekend, or that dream vacation home, or borrow someone else’s new gadget and see what you think. Think about the last time you bought something you really, really wanted and it ended up collecting dust or taking up storage space. Stop and ask yourself, How long will this make me happy?
The third key to contentment is to develop a grateful heart. Gratitude is the most important key to contentment. A grateful heart recognizes that life itself, all of it, is a gift. Ask yourself, do you spend more time giving thanks for what you have or more time thinking about what’s missing or what’s wrong in your life? In all circumstances, we can find something to complain about and we can find something for which to be grateful. Which would you rather do? Complain or give thanks. Oh, I know how much fun it can be to complain. I can whine really well. In the end, it doesn’t help much. Not as much as when I search for things I am grateful for and focus on the blessings in my life. Sometimes we think our feelings come first. Often it works the other way around. When I express my gratitude, when I do loving things, when I name my blessings, then over time I find that I have changed, the feelings of gratitude and love for my life flow over me like I’m standing in a warm shower.
The fourth key to contentment is found in this question: Where does my soul find true satisfaction? Adam Hamilton says it this way: “Deep in our hearts we desire to be connected with the One who is the Creator of the universe. We need to believe our lives have meaning. We need to know there is grace and mercy when we have blown it. We need to know there is hope in the face of the darkest circumstances. We need to know we are loved unconditionally by Someone who knows us better than we know ourselves. And we need to be able to share this love in meaningful relationships with others. Contentment is found in our relationship with God and our relationship with others.”
The book of Ecclesiastes is a rather cynical book in the Bible. Many believe this book was written by King Solomon in his later years. If not King Solomon then someone like him who sought pleasure after pleasure, worked for pleasure and realized it was all for vanity, like chasing after the wind. Satisfaction of our souls comes from deep, intimate, trusting relationships. The kind of relationship that we can have with God—one that accepts us as we are, warts and all.
Contentment and simplicity go hand in hand. Simplicity says that less is more. Adam Hamilton gives us 5 ways to simplify your life that I will go through quickly.
First, set a goal of reducing your consumption, and choose to live below your means. There are many, many ways to do this. We are getting more and more conscious about doing this is light of climate change, conserving our environment, and our state of our economy. If you have been thinking about making changes, set a goal and do it. Talk to someone about your goal to help you follow through and hold you accountable. It may be as simple as turning off lights regularly, or turning the thermostat down a degree. There is an abundance of information on using less, conserving more, saving money and saving our environment.
The second way to simplify your life is before you make a purchase, ask yourself, “Do I really need this!” and “Why do I want this?” Also, don’t get it right away. Walk away from it and think about it for at least 24 hours before you get it.
Third, use something up before buying something new. I’m really good at this one. I need new tires on my car soon and I’m putting it off as long as possible or until it snows.
Fourth, plan low-cost entertainment that enriches your life. You can spend a lot of money here in Portland on entertainment. The most memorable and entertaining evenings I had growing up is when all of us would sit at the dining room table and play a good, competitive card game of Hearts.
Fifth, ask yourself, “Are there major changes that would allow me to simplify my life?” Take a good, hard look at your life. Look at everything, cars, house, toys. What big change can you make to simplify your life?
Of course, all of this is not easy because it requires the practice of self-control. Adam Hamilton says this about self-control. “Self-control is about forgoing instant gratification by stopping to think about the answers to these three questions:
What are the long-term consequences?
Is there a higher good or a better outcome if I use my resources of time, money, or energy in another way?
Will this action honor God?
One final thing, choosing contentment and simplicity is not about going without. It is about living consciously, with intention, honoring who we are, who God wants us to be, and honoring creation. It’s about treating our life and each others’ lives preciously. For all of life is a gift, it is fragile, and it is temporary. So put your time, energy and resources into something that is meaningful and lasting. It is that simple….but it is not easy. With God’s help and each other’s help, it is possible. Thanks be to God.
Amen.
Prayer:
Gracious, holy God, when you created us, you wired our hearts so that we long for you. We search for meaning and love and a place to belong. Teach us about contentment and peace and joy—the kind we find in you. Give us wisdom and understanding in our lives. Fill our minds and hearts with truth and the power of self-control. Help us to choose the higher good. Teach us the meaning of gratitude.
We have a cloud of witnesses surrounding us this All Saints Day. They have blessed us in so many ways and we remember them and feel their presence. May we live by their good example, to always strive for justice and peace, to walk lightly upon the earth, to love kindness, and to be grateful for the abundance that we have. In Jesus name we pray. Amen.